Green and leafy, carefully placed in a sturdy planter. Watered and loved until ready to be placed in my hands.
I received this gift with a smile, yet I'm sure I saw the plant flinch when it was handed over to me.
Does it know? Is there an ominous aura draped over my home that only flora can sense?
If they could tell, they would see my flowers are silk. There are only a few sickly plants lurking around.
Tell-tale signs of kitty nibblings on the leaves or my blatant neglect that renders them crunchy and dusty.
My reputation for having a black thumb of death deters most well wishers and plant givers.
Try as they might, there are few who aim to break the curse that has been bestowed upon me.
I generously thank those people and silently pray that I get it right this time.
Again.
In the meantime I must toss the remnants of a spider plant that didn't make it through the winter this year.
ps - sorry mom.
4 comments:
Mmm... a new Spring season, a new chance to kill... er, I mean grow something green.
I like to blame external factors for my plants' demise. For example, I live in a wooded area with very little direct sunlight. Some of my plants just don't get enough light to flourish. Sure, I could go get a grow lamp, but who has the time?
Or the time I had some plants at work, and I went on vacation for 2 weeks, and they died because nobody watered them while I was away. Clearly somebody else's fault! (Nevermind that I hadn't watered them for at least 2 weeks prior!)
Maybe the trick is to find a plant that matches your plant growing style. I'm convinced there needs to be an internet search engine for this. I want a plant that (A) doesn't require direct sunlight, (B) doesn't require much water, and (C) will survive in the poorest quality soil. [Click] Voila! A whole list of plants that meet my criteria, complete with guidelines for care and maintenance. Wouldn't that be cool?
Wishful thinking.
Good luck with your new plant, I'm sure it will last at least until winter, maybe longer! Who knows? Maybe this is "the one"!
Egypt: It is hot, it smells hot, it makes me feel hot, it tastes hot..
That was beautiful! Truly!
I'll have to save it for a cold rainy day so I can savor it's hotness. :)LMFAO Jenn hahahahaha!
Long may it warm the cockles of your heart on those cold rainy days.
Also LOL you sound like my mum. She is a plant murderer too. She is currently sucking the life out of a beautiful bamboo plant. I don't know how she does it.
LOL Jenn, don't do it.
Put down the bamboo and step away.
You don't want it to end like this.
LOL
Not to worry! There are plenty more where that one came from, and I made another one today when I walked on one of the babies because I couldn't hold the plant high enough. Bizzie Spider Lady
Post a Comment