What is your favorite genre of music? Classic Rock
Who is your favorite artist from the 70’s? Grateful Dead, Boston, Queen, Stones, Who, Pink Floyd, Clapton, George Harrison, Allman Bros, Thorogood,
Who is your favorite artist from the 80’s? Steele Pulse, Edie Brickell, Elvis Costello, Go Gos, The Police, (I toured with the Dead and didn't listen to much radio then)
Who is your favorite artist from the 90’s? The Offspring, Pearl Jam, Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins, White Stripes
Who is your favorite artist from the 2000’s? My Chemical Romance
What would your dream band reunion be? Pink Floyd with affordable tickets
What was the first musical purchase that you made? Cheap Trick - Live at Buddokan
What is the most surprising part of your music library? Christmas music - tons
What was your favorite one hit wonder’s song? "Sugar, Sugar" by the Archies
Who performed at the first concert you attended? Van Halen, Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers, Rod Steward, Grateful Dead
Who performed at the last concert you attended? Pete Townsend - solo
Who would you most like to see in concert that you haven’t yet? My Chemical Romance
What 3 artists do you play most frequently? White Stripes, My Chemical Romance, Eric Clapton
What is your favorite music video? Ever? I don't know.
What song do you immediately turn off? anything by Celine Dion, Whitney Huston, or Michael Bolton - they make me violent
What is your favorite sexy song? "Pink" by Aerosmith
What song best describes your outlook in life? "Hand in my Pocket" by Alanis Morrisette
What song makes you move…something? "Come Get Your Love" by Redbone
What song can you sing the best? nothing but it doesn't stop me. It's scary.
What 10 artists best summarize your taste in music? Grateful Dead, Pink Floyd, Aerosmith, Eric Clapton, Beatles, Bob Dylan, Bonnie Raitt, White Stripes, My Chemical Romance, The Who, RL Burnside, Nina Simone, The Stones,
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Just Looking Back
My heart goes out to you my friend.
I am angry for you, not at you. I hope you know that.
I can't fix your broken heart, but I can give you a band-aid and seal it with a kiss. We can place our shattered pieces next to one another. Our hearts probably look very similar.
Some may not understand how you feel. But you know I do. I do because I walk in your shoes everyday, and it sucks. Some days I cry for the things that should have been but weren't. Other days I scream in the wind. Going nowhere and not being heard, but exhausting me enough to not care anymore.
Abandonment.
Such a heady word. An action word. It's not supposed to be a feeling word, but it is. To me it feels black and ugly. Full of anger and resentment. Sometimes it's sadness and longing.
Just know this, you are not alone and that I love you.
Honey, it's time for us to get new shoes and walk the hell away from Abandonment. It does not suit us and we can do better. We are better.
I am angry for you, not at you. I hope you know that.
I can't fix your broken heart, but I can give you a band-aid and seal it with a kiss. We can place our shattered pieces next to one another. Our hearts probably look very similar.
Some may not understand how you feel. But you know I do. I do because I walk in your shoes everyday, and it sucks. Some days I cry for the things that should have been but weren't. Other days I scream in the wind. Going nowhere and not being heard, but exhausting me enough to not care anymore.
Abandonment.
Such a heady word. An action word. It's not supposed to be a feeling word, but it is. To me it feels black and ugly. Full of anger and resentment. Sometimes it's sadness and longing.
Just know this, you are not alone and that I love you.
Honey, it's time for us to get new shoes and walk the hell away from Abandonment. It does not suit us and we can do better. We are better.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Thanksgiving
Ok, I was out and about in the world today and I've realized what I am thankful for:
I am thankful for:
~my health, because not everybody is well
~my home, because there are people who don't have one
~my child, because not everybody who wants one has one
~my lousy job, because not everybody has one and needs one
~my friends, because life is tough when you don't have any
I am thankful for:
~my health, because not everybody is well
~my home, because there are people who don't have one
~my child, because not everybody who wants one has one
~my lousy job, because not everybody has one and needs one
~my friends, because life is tough when you don't have any
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Sleep
O soft embalmer of the still midnight,
Shutting, with careful fingers and benign,
Our gloom-pleased eyes, embowered from the light,
Enshaded in forgetfulness divine:
O soothest Sleep! if so it please thee, close,
In midst of this thine hymn, my willing eyes,
Or wait the «Amen», ere thy hoppy throws
Around my bed its lulling charities.
Then save me, or the passed day will shine
Upon my pillow, breeding many woes, -
Save me from curious conscience, that still lords
Its strength for darkness, bun-owing like a mole;
Turn the key deftly in the oiled wards,
And. seal the hushed casket of my soul.
~John Keats
Shutting, with careful fingers and benign,
Our gloom-pleased eyes, embowered from the light,
Enshaded in forgetfulness divine:
O soothest Sleep! if so it please thee, close,
In midst of this thine hymn, my willing eyes,
Or wait the «Amen», ere thy hoppy throws
Around my bed its lulling charities.
Then save me, or the passed day will shine
Upon my pillow, breeding many woes, -
Save me from curious conscience, that still lords
Its strength for darkness, bun-owing like a mole;
Turn the key deftly in the oiled wards,
And. seal the hushed casket of my soul.
~John Keats
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Old Man Winter has nothing on me
Oh, how I enjoy the winter.
I like waking up on a winter morning, when my bed is warm and comfortable. Flannel sheets are pulled up to my chin and flannel pajamas twisted around my body from a restless night of sleep. I am a human blanket burrito. I like the cool air of my bedroom as I peek my nose out from the blankets. My cat is sleeping on the pillow next to my head. His fur tickles my nose. He always opens one eye to look at me and then purrs. As if he's giving me his daily blessing. It's always preferred to stay in bed on cold, crisp mornings.
If it's a preferred day, meaning any day I don't have to go to work, I'll pull on a favorite pair of jeans and a warm sweater. I set my sights on the couch in the living room. It's big. And purple. And soft. It has my name written all over it, just waiting for me to park my body on it. It beckons me, "Come to me. You know you want to. Sit on me. Read a book on me. You know you have a favorite to read. You're not going anywhere. Try it for just a minute."
I tend to heed the call of my couch on those days. I go to my library and pull out an old favorite book. It's pages are tattered and bent. The cover is worn and faded. Signs that this is a book that I love.
Some kindling and dry logs sit in wait in the fireplace. Waiting for me to light the fire. I open the flue and light my match. I watch as the fire slowly takes hold of the paper that is placed under the kindling. Newspaper from earlier in the year I'm sure or perhaps pages from a magazine I had to have. The small flame licks at the kindling. Slowly but surely I see the fire start to gather in strength. A log starts to smoke. I enjoy the smell of the fire in the fireplace. Smoke billows up the chimney from the logs catching fire. Soon, I have a good fire. The heat warms me. The sight is mesmerizing. Too hot to touch, but I can't help but poke at it with the fire poker. The logs are being consumed by the now raging fire. It pops and crackles as if it were alive and talking to me.
I close the fireplace grate and move to my hope chest. I pull out a favorite blanket that now smells of cedar. It's something either my mother or grandmother knitted at least forever ago. It's soft and colorful. I've spent many days and nights wrapped within it's borders as a child and now as an adult. I inhale deeply the smell of the blanket. Cedar, yet something else. Memories of another winter day long ago? Now my day is set.
The couch beckons me. I have a roaring fire in the fireplace, a favorite book, and my trusted blanket. I heed the call.
My body nestles into the couch. I feel my body sigh as the couch welcomes me into its purple softness. I wrap my blanket around me so that I am once again a human blanket burrito. My book is ready to be delved into. As I am wrapped in comfort and wonderful homey smells, I open the pages of my beloved book and start to read. I easily slip out of this world and into another.
I like waking up on a winter morning, when my bed is warm and comfortable. Flannel sheets are pulled up to my chin and flannel pajamas twisted around my body from a restless night of sleep. I am a human blanket burrito. I like the cool air of my bedroom as I peek my nose out from the blankets. My cat is sleeping on the pillow next to my head. His fur tickles my nose. He always opens one eye to look at me and then purrs. As if he's giving me his daily blessing. It's always preferred to stay in bed on cold, crisp mornings.
If it's a preferred day, meaning any day I don't have to go to work, I'll pull on a favorite pair of jeans and a warm sweater. I set my sights on the couch in the living room. It's big. And purple. And soft. It has my name written all over it, just waiting for me to park my body on it. It beckons me, "Come to me. You know you want to. Sit on me. Read a book on me. You know you have a favorite to read. You're not going anywhere. Try it for just a minute."
I tend to heed the call of my couch on those days. I go to my library and pull out an old favorite book. It's pages are tattered and bent. The cover is worn and faded. Signs that this is a book that I love.
Some kindling and dry logs sit in wait in the fireplace. Waiting for me to light the fire. I open the flue and light my match. I watch as the fire slowly takes hold of the paper that is placed under the kindling. Newspaper from earlier in the year I'm sure or perhaps pages from a magazine I had to have. The small flame licks at the kindling. Slowly but surely I see the fire start to gather in strength. A log starts to smoke. I enjoy the smell of the fire in the fireplace. Smoke billows up the chimney from the logs catching fire. Soon, I have a good fire. The heat warms me. The sight is mesmerizing. Too hot to touch, but I can't help but poke at it with the fire poker. The logs are being consumed by the now raging fire. It pops and crackles as if it were alive and talking to me.
I close the fireplace grate and move to my hope chest. I pull out a favorite blanket that now smells of cedar. It's something either my mother or grandmother knitted at least forever ago. It's soft and colorful. I've spent many days and nights wrapped within it's borders as a child and now as an adult. I inhale deeply the smell of the blanket. Cedar, yet something else. Memories of another winter day long ago? Now my day is set.
The couch beckons me. I have a roaring fire in the fireplace, a favorite book, and my trusted blanket. I heed the call.
My body nestles into the couch. I feel my body sigh as the couch welcomes me into its purple softness. I wrap my blanket around me so that I am once again a human blanket burrito. My book is ready to be delved into. As I am wrapped in comfort and wonderful homey smells, I open the pages of my beloved book and start to read. I easily slip out of this world and into another.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Death by Chocolate
I had a friend. Let's just call her Lois. She was the mother of a boy I dated in high school.
Lois had a hard life. She murdered her husband after receiving one too many beatings. She used his service revolver and pumped several rounds into him. She pleaded "Self defense" but still had to do the time.
Her children were taken away from her when she went to jail. When she got out of jail, she returned home. It was empty. Her children were gone. Her abusive husband was gone. Heck, even the dog was gone. Her neighbors wouldn't talk to her. Her friends abandoned her even though they knew what kind of abuse she had been living with.
Her son, came to visit her once a month. Lois was how I stayed in touch with him.
I learned so much from her. My mother didn't understand the friendship I had with her. I would go to her house after school to hang out with her for a couple of hours a day. High school was miserable for me. I was in between groups. Shit on by the cooler groups and ignored by the other groups. The only groups that were willing to have me, were ones that had bad habits.
- I learned how to make drinks. She was a raging alcoholic and power smoker. I learned the names of the whiskeys and how to mix them - neatly. I also learned how to roll your own, with a cigarette machine. I had such fun, rolling cigarettes for her. I don't know why, but I did.
- I learned how to make lasagna.
- I learned the joys of chocolate by making candies.
- I learned how to look at fashion design patterns. She attempted to teach me how to design and sew, but I'm a hopeless mess when it comes to that type of thing. She made me dresses she had designed from the 50s. I would help her design something and she would make it for me.
- She introduced me to comedy albums. Sometimes we would sit in her dark living room and just listen to her albums. I would lay on the floor, with her big ol' Mastiff dog laying next to me. I would laugh and laugh, in the dark. Lois would sit on the couch, holding her drink in one hand and a Pall Mall in the other. She would explain some of the things I didn't get or explain the history of why a certain joke was funny. Those were some of my most favorite times because she talked to me as if I were an equal.
- She taught me how to shoot a BB gun
- She told me to never take any shit from anybody, because I'm better than that. I deserve more.
- She allowed my friends to come and hang out at her house. She liked to entertain and hear the stories about what was going on with her son's old friends. Most of all, I think she liked the company no matter what we said.
- she taught me the dirtiest words and how to use them effectively. We would also get a good laugh calling each other awful, awful names. She was always better than me, but I was just a young grasshopper.
- she also just talked to me, like I had a brain, like I mattered. She helped when she could, and admitted when she couldn't.
I moved away from the neighborhood when I was 15. I kept in touch with a few of my friends in the neighborhood, but as I grew up, the contacts were lost or forgotten. I had grown up and so did they. I had long ago lost contact with the boyfriend I was so crazy about. Except for Lois. She never ceased to amaze me. Her letters were like clockwork. They would show up when I most needed it. A kind word here, a drawn funny picture there. Always to support me and my crazy needs. We actually kept in touch for many years.
One day I tried to call her. The phone rang and rang. She didn't believe in answering machines, so calling her could be hit or miss. I was missing. I was missing for months. I sent letters. Still no word. I kept trying to call. One day the phone number didn't work. I had lost a friend. Literally LOST a friend. I didn't know where to find her. Her daughters had gotten married and I couldn't find her son.
I had a nagging feeling two years ago. I spent a day trying to search out her son. It took a while, but I did. I called him. He had his mother's laugh. I explained who I was and asked if he remembered me. He did remember me. I explained that I had been looking for his mother. He didn't understand why. I had to further explain how we had been friends when I was younger and had lost touch with her. I wanted to know if she was ok.
She wasn't. She had died two years earlier. But he did have a wonderful story to tell me about her. And, I will share it with you.
Lois was a chain-smoking lunatic. She had stopped driving her 1972 black Cadillac a few years before. She really only drove it to get a carton of smokes and a bottle of bourbon. Well, she was having an emergency. She was out of smokes and couldn't go to the store. So, she did as most logical people would do, she called 911 for help. (yes, she really did)
When the ambulance arrived, she explained that she needed cigarettes in the worst way. The EMTs decided she may need to go to the hospital for an evaluation. She went, but only because they promised her a pack of smokes on the way to the hospital. It turns out she was in heart failure. Her heart was so ravaged by the years of chain-smoking and drinking, there was nothing anybody could do.
Within weeks, she was in a hospice care unit. She made amends with her children during that time. On her last day on living earth she was in her usual form. She was in and out of consciousness. She would come to, say a few loving words, and ask for chocolate. (yes, chocolate) She couldn't eat it, but she could smell it.
Her son would hold a piece of chocolate to her nose and she would again fall asleep. Every time she woke up, she asked for chocolate. She just wanted to smell chocolate. She died that day, with chocolate held up to her nose.
She was a murderer, a mother, a chain-smoking alcoholic. But above all things, she was my friend who shared the love of chocolate with me.
Lois had a hard life. She murdered her husband after receiving one too many beatings. She used his service revolver and pumped several rounds into him. She pleaded "Self defense" but still had to do the time.
Her children were taken away from her when she went to jail. When she got out of jail, she returned home. It was empty. Her children were gone. Her abusive husband was gone. Heck, even the dog was gone. Her neighbors wouldn't talk to her. Her friends abandoned her even though they knew what kind of abuse she had been living with.
Her son, came to visit her once a month. Lois was how I stayed in touch with him.
I learned so much from her. My mother didn't understand the friendship I had with her. I would go to her house after school to hang out with her for a couple of hours a day. High school was miserable for me. I was in between groups. Shit on by the cooler groups and ignored by the other groups. The only groups that were willing to have me, were ones that had bad habits.
- I learned how to make drinks. She was a raging alcoholic and power smoker. I learned the names of the whiskeys and how to mix them - neatly. I also learned how to roll your own, with a cigarette machine. I had such fun, rolling cigarettes for her. I don't know why, but I did.
- I learned how to make lasagna.
- I learned the joys of chocolate by making candies.
- I learned how to look at fashion design patterns. She attempted to teach me how to design and sew, but I'm a hopeless mess when it comes to that type of thing. She made me dresses she had designed from the 50s. I would help her design something and she would make it for me.
- She introduced me to comedy albums. Sometimes we would sit in her dark living room and just listen to her albums. I would lay on the floor, with her big ol' Mastiff dog laying next to me. I would laugh and laugh, in the dark. Lois would sit on the couch, holding her drink in one hand and a Pall Mall in the other. She would explain some of the things I didn't get or explain the history of why a certain joke was funny. Those were some of my most favorite times because she talked to me as if I were an equal.
- She taught me how to shoot a BB gun
- She told me to never take any shit from anybody, because I'm better than that. I deserve more.
- She allowed my friends to come and hang out at her house. She liked to entertain and hear the stories about what was going on with her son's old friends. Most of all, I think she liked the company no matter what we said.
- she taught me the dirtiest words and how to use them effectively. We would also get a good laugh calling each other awful, awful names. She was always better than me, but I was just a young grasshopper.
- she also just talked to me, like I had a brain, like I mattered. She helped when she could, and admitted when she couldn't.
I moved away from the neighborhood when I was 15. I kept in touch with a few of my friends in the neighborhood, but as I grew up, the contacts were lost or forgotten. I had grown up and so did they. I had long ago lost contact with the boyfriend I was so crazy about. Except for Lois. She never ceased to amaze me. Her letters were like clockwork. They would show up when I most needed it. A kind word here, a drawn funny picture there. Always to support me and my crazy needs. We actually kept in touch for many years.
One day I tried to call her. The phone rang and rang. She didn't believe in answering machines, so calling her could be hit or miss. I was missing. I was missing for months. I sent letters. Still no word. I kept trying to call. One day the phone number didn't work. I had lost a friend. Literally LOST a friend. I didn't know where to find her. Her daughters had gotten married and I couldn't find her son.
I had a nagging feeling two years ago. I spent a day trying to search out her son. It took a while, but I did. I called him. He had his mother's laugh. I explained who I was and asked if he remembered me. He did remember me. I explained that I had been looking for his mother. He didn't understand why. I had to further explain how we had been friends when I was younger and had lost touch with her. I wanted to know if she was ok.
She wasn't. She had died two years earlier. But he did have a wonderful story to tell me about her. And, I will share it with you.
Lois was a chain-smoking lunatic. She had stopped driving her 1972 black Cadillac a few years before. She really only drove it to get a carton of smokes and a bottle of bourbon. Well, she was having an emergency. She was out of smokes and couldn't go to the store. So, she did as most logical people would do, she called 911 for help. (yes, she really did)
When the ambulance arrived, she explained that she needed cigarettes in the worst way. The EMTs decided she may need to go to the hospital for an evaluation. She went, but only because they promised her a pack of smokes on the way to the hospital. It turns out she was in heart failure. Her heart was so ravaged by the years of chain-smoking and drinking, there was nothing anybody could do.
Within weeks, she was in a hospice care unit. She made amends with her children during that time. On her last day on living earth she was in her usual form. She was in and out of consciousness. She would come to, say a few loving words, and ask for chocolate. (yes, chocolate) She couldn't eat it, but she could smell it.
Her son would hold a piece of chocolate to her nose and she would again fall asleep. Every time she woke up, she asked for chocolate. She just wanted to smell chocolate. She died that day, with chocolate held up to her nose.
She was a murderer, a mother, a chain-smoking alcoholic. But above all things, she was my friend who shared the love of chocolate with me.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
The fuse has been lit...
Pardon me while I pull the knife out from between my shoulder blades. All I have to say is:
A true friend stabs you in the front. ~ Oscar Wilde
A true friend stabs you in the front. ~ Oscar Wilde
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Wish You Were Here
I got a letter from your mother today. She almost mentioned your name, but didn't quite do it. She hasn't mentioned your name to me since the day I got the news about you. The dreams about you have nearly stopped. After 18 years, you would think I would let it go, let you go, by now. But I can't.
When I write to your mother, I want to tell her funny things about you that she didn't know. But I don't know how to start. I haven't mentioned your name to her since that day. I write your name and crumple up the paper in frustration. I worry that I'll make her cry. I don't want to do that because she's the only part of you I have left. She gets to pretend she still has a daughter through me and my family. I never thought I would be a surrogate daughter. I don't remember filling out an application. I take the position sadly.
Your picture is still on my mirror. It has traveled from house, to house, to house. Never moving from it's spot from when you sent it to me. It's a little dusty and faded, but I protect it like none other. I don't have any more of you, and I can't get anymore. It is still precious to me, as you were.
When you were 18, did you picture yourself as an old lady? Did you think you would get married and have children? Could you see me in your future? I envisioned my future with a spouse and children, but oddly enough you were never in the picture. What does that mean?
You were a bright light that was extinguished too early. It's not fair. I wasn't done with you. There were things we still needed to do, see, hear. God, I miss you.
When I write to your mother, I want to tell her funny things about you that she didn't know. But I don't know how to start. I haven't mentioned your name to her since that day. I write your name and crumple up the paper in frustration. I worry that I'll make her cry. I don't want to do that because she's the only part of you I have left. She gets to pretend she still has a daughter through me and my family. I never thought I would be a surrogate daughter. I don't remember filling out an application. I take the position sadly.
Your picture is still on my mirror. It has traveled from house, to house, to house. Never moving from it's spot from when you sent it to me. It's a little dusty and faded, but I protect it like none other. I don't have any more of you, and I can't get anymore. It is still precious to me, as you were.
When you were 18, did you picture yourself as an old lady? Did you think you would get married and have children? Could you see me in your future? I envisioned my future with a spouse and children, but oddly enough you were never in the picture. What does that mean?
You were a bright light that was extinguished too early. It's not fair. I wasn't done with you. There were things we still needed to do, see, hear. God, I miss you.
Monday, November 5, 2007
Love My Way
Psychedelic Furs "Love My Way" was on the radio today. As I drove to work on a brisk Autumn morning, I had a flashback to my teen years with my best friend.
I could almost smell the Hawaiian Tropic suntan oil. I could hear the giggling of the two of us. No doubt trying to pick which Duran Duran guy was cuter. The answer was always different. The answers changed as often as our bathing suits. I think fondly back on that time of walking around the park in our little plaid shorts and Izod tops, both of us with a mouthful of braces. No worries, just concern if our tans were even or not. She always tanned better than I ever could. It was an envy of mine.
We would pinch smokes from her mother's freezer and pretend to be cool smoking in the backyard. The radio would blare throughout the house until her mom came home. Then we would have to behave like the little angels she knew us to be.
At times life was easier. We grew up together through Barbies, 1st Communion, and learning dirty lymerics. We shared our innermost thoughts on boys (yay!) and jealous girls at school (boo!). We did each others hair and nails, as you would expect to hear about girls and slumber parties. We weren't afraid to ask each other questions about sex. "What was it? They do what? Hmm, never thought about it that way." I was never made to feel immature or stupid in her presence. We were inseparable.
As the song ended, I thought of how we separated. I moved away, clear across the country. We tried to keep in touch, but 15-year-olds just don't do that well. Miles apart and lives changing. Within a few years, she moved too. I went my way and she, hers. We keep in touch, not as much as I would like. I find that I get jealous of her new friends, I wonder if she feels the same about mine? After all, she was mine first and I hate to share.
I'm glad I heard the song, and was surprised of the memories that sprang to life. I guess I should call her sometime soon to let her know I've been thinking of her.
Love My Way
There's an army on the dance floor
It's a fashion with a gun my love
In a room without a door
A kiss is not enough In
Love my way
It's a new road
I follow where
My mind goes
They'd put us on a railroad
They'd dearly make us pay
For laughing In their faces
And making it our way
There's emptiness behind their eyes
There's dust in all their hearts
They just want to steal us all
And take us all apart but not in
Love my way
It's a new road
I follow where
My mind goes
So swallow all your tears my love
And put on your new face
You can never win or lose
If you don't run the race
I could almost smell the Hawaiian Tropic suntan oil. I could hear the giggling of the two of us. No doubt trying to pick which Duran Duran guy was cuter. The answer was always different. The answers changed as often as our bathing suits. I think fondly back on that time of walking around the park in our little plaid shorts and Izod tops, both of us with a mouthful of braces. No worries, just concern if our tans were even or not. She always tanned better than I ever could. It was an envy of mine.
We would pinch smokes from her mother's freezer and pretend to be cool smoking in the backyard. The radio would blare throughout the house until her mom came home. Then we would have to behave like the little angels she knew us to be.
At times life was easier. We grew up together through Barbies, 1st Communion, and learning dirty lymerics. We shared our innermost thoughts on boys (yay!) and jealous girls at school (boo!). We did each others hair and nails, as you would expect to hear about girls and slumber parties. We weren't afraid to ask each other questions about sex. "What was it? They do what? Hmm, never thought about it that way." I was never made to feel immature or stupid in her presence. We were inseparable.
As the song ended, I thought of how we separated. I moved away, clear across the country. We tried to keep in touch, but 15-year-olds just don't do that well. Miles apart and lives changing. Within a few years, she moved too. I went my way and she, hers. We keep in touch, not as much as I would like. I find that I get jealous of her new friends, I wonder if she feels the same about mine? After all, she was mine first and I hate to share.
I'm glad I heard the song, and was surprised of the memories that sprang to life. I guess I should call her sometime soon to let her know I've been thinking of her.
Love My Way
There's an army on the dance floor
It's a fashion with a gun my love
In a room without a door
A kiss is not enough In
Love my way
It's a new road
I follow where
My mind goes
They'd put us on a railroad
They'd dearly make us pay
For laughing In their faces
And making it our way
There's emptiness behind their eyes
There's dust in all their hearts
They just want to steal us all
And take us all apart but not in
Love my way
It's a new road
I follow where
My mind goes
So swallow all your tears my love
And put on your new face
You can never win or lose
If you don't run the race
More questions, more answers
1. Things you are trying to avoid doing.
clean the house
quit my job
falling apart in front of people
2. Ways to pick you out of a crowd.
loud laughter
in a crowd of guys (girls are too competitive)
by the food
3. Things your hometown is known for.
Cheesesteak
losing sports teams (they choke)
Liberty Bell
4. Of your biggest hobbies.
Writing
Reading
Gardening (I have the black thumb of death, but I like it none-the-less)
cooking for friends
5. Things you are currently happy about.
Autumn
my comfy bed
starting a new house project
6. Types of events you would like to attend.
A masquerade ball
A blues fest
7. Things you would like to learn how to do.
Be an optimist
speak Italian
sew (I'm pretty handy with a glue gun)
8. Things you are proud of yourself for doing.
not quitting my job
learning how to cook new and exciting meals that are edible
gutting and rebuilding my home
raising a nice kid
9. Things you regret doing in 2007.
smoking
making my boss cry
not taking my vitamins
hurting my friend with my words
10. Things that you want to accomplish in 2008.
quit smoking
take vitamins
be better to myself in general
++ 20 of my favorite things ++
1. my family
2. snow days
3. shoes
4. watching children play
5. chocolate
6. loud music
7. my car
8. home movies
9. dinner parties at my house
10. sitting by a pool with a good book
11. trashy or horror novels
12. my cat
13. Autumn
14. movies from the 50/60s
15. laughter
16. scary movies
17. Nintendo
18. cooking
19. smell of the earth after a rain
20. uninvited guests who bring me flowers
The questions is, who are you? Take the challenge and answer honestly. You might learn a thing or two about yourself.
clean the house
quit my job
falling apart in front of people
2. Ways to pick you out of a crowd.
loud laughter
in a crowd of guys (girls are too competitive)
by the food
3. Things your hometown is known for.
Cheesesteak
losing sports teams (they choke)
Liberty Bell
4. Of your biggest hobbies.
Writing
Reading
Gardening (I have the black thumb of death, but I like it none-the-less)
cooking for friends
5. Things you are currently happy about.
Autumn
my comfy bed
starting a new house project
6. Types of events you would like to attend.
A masquerade ball
A blues fest
7. Things you would like to learn how to do.
Be an optimist
speak Italian
sew (I'm pretty handy with a glue gun)
8. Things you are proud of yourself for doing.
not quitting my job
learning how to cook new and exciting meals that are edible
gutting and rebuilding my home
raising a nice kid
9. Things you regret doing in 2007.
smoking
making my boss cry
not taking my vitamins
hurting my friend with my words
10. Things that you want to accomplish in 2008.
quit smoking
take vitamins
be better to myself in general
++ 20 of my favorite things ++
1. my family
2. snow days
3. shoes
4. watching children play
5. chocolate
6. loud music
7. my car
8. home movies
9. dinner parties at my house
10. sitting by a pool with a good book
11. trashy or horror novels
12. my cat
13. Autumn
14. movies from the 50/60s
15. laughter
16. scary movies
17. Nintendo
18. cooking
19. smell of the earth after a rain
20. uninvited guests who bring me flowers
The questions is, who are you? Take the challenge and answer honestly. You might learn a thing or two about yourself.
Sunday, November 4, 2007
Mayo Quiz
A fun game for y'all, about y'all!
Longtime lurker here and I was thinking of this all day. Been following y'all for a few months, not in a creepy way!!! But I thought you all would have some fun with this so I made it for you. It's the MAYO BLOG QUIZ!!! See how well you know your hosts and your fellow blog readers and commenters!!!
1) Who was the original blogger that started all of this? CJ
2) Who came next? LoveMan
3) Who was Mayo originally thought to be? And why? LynZ Because of a crude remark about "shaking hands" with his package or something lame like that.
4) SS once posted under another name. What was that name? Ignotus
4B) What does that name mean? Unknown
5) Before this blog came along, who was originally thought to be a certain lead singer? SDock10
Now let's see how well you know your most regular posters, and most regular topics of conversation.
6) Which person often feels ignored or left out? Toujours or Star, Elena, Entropy
7) Who is the youngest known person on this blog? Silence
8) Who is the oldest? Myalyas
9) What do you think is the average age of the people who come here? 30ish
11) Which posters are sisters? Smoke&Venom20 and Sdock10!
12) Which posters are not sisters but live together? Original Punks
13) What was "Mustardisbetter's" original name on here? Anon2007
14) Who wears the boots in this blog? Sister Midnight
15) Who is "Dr. Nut?" Sdock10, our beloved trainer for the NutBusters' kickball team.
16) Which person on these blogs sees dead people? Kapunua,Sister Midnight, & Jennicula
17) The "Original Punks" were at one time thought to be which two women? Jamia & Alicia
18) What is the most quoted band on this blog? Taking Back Sunday or My Chemical Romance
19) Which person here goes out with a welder? Ergoproxy
20) Which person here has admitted to intimacy issues and prefers to live with her cats? Andrea or Gnothi Seuton
21) Who wrote the original cheer for friday night Kickball? Ergroproxy
22) Who wrote the original "open letter"? Which band or band member was it written to? Veritavenom written to Gerard Way
23) Which person on these blogs was bullied really bad in school and later got revenge? Kapunua
23b) How did she get it?
24) Which person did Mayo refer to in his profile not once, but twice? SDock10
25) Who is "The Princess"? Smoke&Venom20
26) Who here is rumoured to look like Lyn-Z? Kapunua
27) Who is The King? Shitsubou Shita (SS)
27b) What is he the King of? FuckFest2007
28) Who recently lost a good friend? Myalyas & Silence
29) One time, a man posted that he was probably the only man here. He told a secret. What was it? He was a virgin and he felt he didn't measure up 'down there'.
30) Which person here is attracted to "wayyyy older men"?? Paperhearts, or Gnothi Seauton
31) What is the single most quoted song on this blog? Spin, Spin, Sugar by the Sneaker Pimps
32) Which poster knew the Way brothers when they woked at a book store? Star
33) Which person on these blogs has the biggest boobs? Original Punks (L) or Bleeding Chaos
34) Which person is part Innuit? Paperheartxx
35) Which person uses her great grandmother's name? Elena
36) Which person here says they are a functioning alcoholic? Carrie
37) Which person here posted the secret that they are "afraid to stop moving" and "find failure...."? Mayo
38) Who's real name is Dawn? Star
39) Who went to London and took a Black Parade costume? Resurrected Wreck
40) Who has tattoos featuring the artwork of Gerard Way? Elena
You guys can add your own questions if you want!
41. Who's been reading lovemans blog even before Mayo showed up:( ?
42. Who just found out why missT had a glitter bum? Fimble Star
43. Who had gerards eyes as a screensaver?
44. Who is #8 in the nocturnal club? Fimble Star
45. Who loves Dr Who? Marthajones
46. Who's ass gets the most action? Kapunuas
November 5, 2007 1:37 AM
Longtime lurker here and I was thinking of this all day. Been following y'all for a few months, not in a creepy way!!! But I thought you all would have some fun with this so I made it for you. It's the MAYO BLOG QUIZ!!! See how well you know your hosts and your fellow blog readers and commenters!!!
1) Who was the original blogger that started all of this? CJ
2) Who came next? LoveMan
3) Who was Mayo originally thought to be? And why? LynZ Because of a crude remark about "shaking hands" with his package or something lame like that.
4) SS once posted under another name. What was that name? Ignotus
4B) What does that name mean? Unknown
5) Before this blog came along, who was originally thought to be a certain lead singer? SDock10
Now let's see how well you know your most regular posters, and most regular topics of conversation.
6) Which person often feels ignored or left out? Toujours or Star, Elena, Entropy
7) Who is the youngest known person on this blog? Silence
8) Who is the oldest? Myalyas
9) What do you think is the average age of the people who come here? 30ish
11) Which posters are sisters? Smoke&Venom20 and Sdock10!
12) Which posters are not sisters but live together? Original Punks
13) What was "Mustardisbetter's" original name on here? Anon2007
14) Who wears the boots in this blog? Sister Midnight
15) Who is "Dr. Nut?" Sdock10, our beloved trainer for the NutBusters' kickball team.
16) Which person on these blogs sees dead people? Kapunua,Sister Midnight, & Jennicula
17) The "Original Punks" were at one time thought to be which two women? Jamia & Alicia
18) What is the most quoted band on this blog? Taking Back Sunday or My Chemical Romance
19) Which person here goes out with a welder? Ergoproxy
20) Which person here has admitted to intimacy issues and prefers to live with her cats? Andrea or Gnothi Seuton
21) Who wrote the original cheer for friday night Kickball? Ergroproxy
22) Who wrote the original "open letter"? Which band or band member was it written to? Veritavenom written to Gerard Way
23) Which person on these blogs was bullied really bad in school and later got revenge? Kapunua
23b) How did she get it?
24) Which person did Mayo refer to in his profile not once, but twice? SDock10
25) Who is "The Princess"? Smoke&Venom20
26) Who here is rumoured to look like Lyn-Z? Kapunua
27) Who is The King? Shitsubou Shita (SS)
27b) What is he the King of? FuckFest2007
28) Who recently lost a good friend? Myalyas & Silence
29) One time, a man posted that he was probably the only man here. He told a secret. What was it? He was a virgin and he felt he didn't measure up 'down there'.
30) Which person here is attracted to "wayyyy older men"?? Paperhearts, or Gnothi Seauton
31) What is the single most quoted song on this blog? Spin, Spin, Sugar by the Sneaker Pimps
32) Which poster knew the Way brothers when they woked at a book store? Star
33) Which person on these blogs has the biggest boobs? Original Punks (L) or Bleeding Chaos
34) Which person is part Innuit? Paperheartxx
35) Which person uses her great grandmother's name? Elena
36) Which person here says they are a functioning alcoholic? Carrie
37) Which person here posted the secret that they are "afraid to stop moving" and "find failure...."? Mayo
38) Who's real name is Dawn? Star
39) Who went to London and took a Black Parade costume? Resurrected Wreck
40) Who has tattoos featuring the artwork of Gerard Way? Elena
You guys can add your own questions if you want!
41. Who's been reading lovemans blog even before Mayo showed up:( ?
42. Who just found out why missT had a glitter bum? Fimble Star
43. Who had gerards eyes as a screensaver?
44. Who is #8 in the nocturnal club? Fimble Star
45. Who loves Dr Who? Marthajones
46. Who's ass gets the most action? Kapunuas
November 5, 2007 1:37 AM
Friday, November 2, 2007
Double-dog Dare
Dared to answer. Here we go
1. What is your favorite color? Depends on the mood. Today it's black
2. You can choose to have one superpower- what would you pick? I'd like to fly
3. What is your favorite book? "The Vampire Lestat"
4. Were you ever arrested? You have to catch me first
5. Do you have a favorite pet? Yes, a Carin Terrier
6. What is your favorite condiment? Ketsup
7. How tall are you? 5 feet short (but I'm taller in my mind)
8. What don't you ever leave home without? Bonnie Bell lip gloss, peanut butter crackers, my phone
9. Can you burp the alphabet? Yes, hey I never claimed to be a flower
10. What loss has been the most devastating? my best friend
11. What do you do when you're nervous? pull at my hair
12. What is your lucky number? 5
13. Did you ever shoot a gun? Yes
14. Were you born with any birth defects? Yes, but was corrected
15. What sport do you enjoy watching the most? I'd rather eat lint
16. What sport do you enjoy participating in the most? Sunbathing, can that be a sport?
17. Have you ever contemplated suicide? Yes
18. What is your favorite flavor of bubble gum? Grape
19. What personality trait is the most important? A sense of humor.
20. How many times a week do you pleasure yourself? In a house full of people, like I have time for that?
21. You must give up one of your five senses- which can you live without? Taste
22. What is your favorite scent? vanilla & leather
23. What is your favorite sound? laughter
24. What is your favorite thing to look at? Tornados
25. What is your favorite thing to touch? my son's face
26. What is your favorite flavor? Chocolate
27. Did you ever call a phone sex number? No, I would laugh too much and then it'd be a waste of my money
28. Who would you like to say thank you to? the surgeon that saved my son's life
29. What topic is your favorite to talk about? other people - I'm a bitch at times
30. Who are your top 3 girl crushes? Meg Ryan (before her new face), Janeanne Garofolo, (I could only think of 2)
31. Who are your top 3 guy crushes? Gerard Way, Keanu Reeves, Jason Statham
32. What is on your favorite sandwich? Turkey hoagie with lettuce, tomato, and mayo
33. Do you ever read your horoscope? Sometimes
34. What is the best thing about your gender? The ability to carry a child, feed, and nurture it
35. What is the best thing about the opposite gender? With the right one, a sense of protection
36. Did you ever buy something from a TV infomercial? No
37. What has been your favorite job? Volunteer at a hospital
38. You have to dye your hair a mix of two colors, which do you choose? Platinum and pink
39. What is your favorite snack food? Salty - peanuts; sweet - non-pariels
40. Do you collect anything? friends
41. A book is being written about you...title suggestion? "But, she looked so normal"
42. When did you last pray? Last month, it worked out
43. How many tattoos do you have? None yet. It's permanent.
44. Who makes you laugh the most? Wooly
45. What is your favorite quote? "A true friend stabs you in the front" Oscar Wilde
46. Do you still have your favorite childhood toy? Yes, Malibu Barbie
47. What are you most often complemented on? My laugh
48. What CD do you listen to the most? 3 Cheers by MCR; and a 70s mix CD
49. If you got to choose, how would you die? Old and in my sleep
50. How many piercings do you have? Just my ears, several times
51. Are you left or right handed? Right
52. What is your favorite beverage? Hot- Tea, Cold- Iced Tea,
53. Can you change a flat tire? Yes
54. When do you feel you are most attractive? When I'm sleeping
55. What event made the most impact on your life? My parent's divorce and subsequent multiple remarriages
56. Which "ex" do you miss the most? none of them
57. What celebrity would have the coolest nervous breakdown? Oprah
58. What is your favorite alcoholic beverage? Cherry Bomb martini
59. How do you top the perfect sundae? Whipped cream and a cherry
60. What TV show do you secretly watch? The L Word
61. What is your favorite outfit? Winter - Broken in Levis, brown boots, comfy sweater; Summer - sun dress
62. What is your least favorite household chore? cleaning the bathroom - yuck!
63. What is the strangest trick your body can do? My knees can hyper extend, it's bizarre
64. What was the best gift you ever got? My son
65. Which of the seven sins do you commit the most? Gossip
66. What is your favorite charity? Ronald McDonald House
67. Which language do you wish you knew? Italian
68. What would you have named yourself? Avilise Anne
69. What is your best contribution to the world? My son
70. What song are you embarrassed to admit knowing all the words to? “Dancing Queen”
71. What song gets stuck in your head most often? "I've got spurs that jingle, jangle, jingle...."
72. You can kill one person and get away with it. Who should I warn? Piggy, don't warn her.
73. What is your perfect meal? Chicken Marsala over linguine and asparagus and Lemon Meringue pie
74. What one color would you obliterate from the planet? puce
75. Do you have a favorite car? my car
76. What physical quality of yours do you like the most? My eyes
77. What is your favorite season? Autumn
78. What is your worst habit? Talking too much
79. Do you bite your tongue or tell them like it is? I can't help but tell it like it is to a fault
80. What is your favorite holiday? Halloween
81. If you could visit a different county, which would it be? Italy
82. What was your favorite childhood game? hide n' seek
83. What do people need more of? laughter
84. What do people need less of? titles
85. What's the scariest thing in your fridge? pork roll
86. What is your favorite sexual position? When I'm in control
87. Do you have a hidden talent? I "know" things - it freaks out my friends and family
88. What was the worst part of your childhood? Divorce
89. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I worry too much
90. What do you fear the most? Dying young and spiders
91. Which would you rather be a contestant on- American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance or America's Next Top Model? I have no talent, I should be paid to NOT participate
92. Which would you rather attend- the opera, a poetry recital or a random lecture? Opera
93. Would you ever bare your soul to a stranger in a letter? Why not
94. When are you at your happiest? When I'm on vacation or at Disneyland
95. What is your favorite game as an adult? Legend of Zelda
96. What celebrity would you most like to have dinner with? Dead - Jerry Garcia; Live - anyone from MCR
97. What time period do you wish you lived in? Victorian
98. Which TV personality would you want a one night hook up with? Sawyer from Lost
99. What friend do you miss the most? Laura
100. What one thing will you try not to do again? Argue with a crazy person
101. Why did you want to answer these questions? I was dared.
1. What is your favorite color? Depends on the mood. Today it's black
2. You can choose to have one superpower- what would you pick? I'd like to fly
3. What is your favorite book? "The Vampire Lestat"
4. Were you ever arrested? You have to catch me first
5. Do you have a favorite pet? Yes, a Carin Terrier
6. What is your favorite condiment? Ketsup
7. How tall are you? 5 feet short (but I'm taller in my mind)
8. What don't you ever leave home without? Bonnie Bell lip gloss, peanut butter crackers, my phone
9. Can you burp the alphabet? Yes, hey I never claimed to be a flower
10. What loss has been the most devastating? my best friend
11. What do you do when you're nervous? pull at my hair
12. What is your lucky number? 5
13. Did you ever shoot a gun? Yes
14. Were you born with any birth defects? Yes, but was corrected
15. What sport do you enjoy watching the most? I'd rather eat lint
16. What sport do you enjoy participating in the most? Sunbathing, can that be a sport?
17. Have you ever contemplated suicide? Yes
18. What is your favorite flavor of bubble gum? Grape
19. What personality trait is the most important? A sense of humor.
20. How many times a week do you pleasure yourself? In a house full of people, like I have time for that?
21. You must give up one of your five senses- which can you live without? Taste
22. What is your favorite scent? vanilla & leather
23. What is your favorite sound? laughter
24. What is your favorite thing to look at? Tornados
25. What is your favorite thing to touch? my son's face
26. What is your favorite flavor? Chocolate
27. Did you ever call a phone sex number? No, I would laugh too much and then it'd be a waste of my money
28. Who would you like to say thank you to? the surgeon that saved my son's life
29. What topic is your favorite to talk about? other people - I'm a bitch at times
30. Who are your top 3 girl crushes? Meg Ryan (before her new face), Janeanne Garofolo, (I could only think of 2)
31. Who are your top 3 guy crushes? Gerard Way, Keanu Reeves, Jason Statham
32. What is on your favorite sandwich? Turkey hoagie with lettuce, tomato, and mayo
33. Do you ever read your horoscope? Sometimes
34. What is the best thing about your gender? The ability to carry a child, feed, and nurture it
35. What is the best thing about the opposite gender? With the right one, a sense of protection
36. Did you ever buy something from a TV infomercial? No
37. What has been your favorite job? Volunteer at a hospital
38. You have to dye your hair a mix of two colors, which do you choose? Platinum and pink
39. What is your favorite snack food? Salty - peanuts; sweet - non-pariels
40. Do you collect anything? friends
41. A book is being written about you...title suggestion? "But, she looked so normal"
42. When did you last pray? Last month, it worked out
43. How many tattoos do you have? None yet. It's permanent.
44. Who makes you laugh the most? Wooly
45. What is your favorite quote? "A true friend stabs you in the front" Oscar Wilde
46. Do you still have your favorite childhood toy? Yes, Malibu Barbie
47. What are you most often complemented on? My laugh
48. What CD do you listen to the most? 3 Cheers by MCR; and a 70s mix CD
49. If you got to choose, how would you die? Old and in my sleep
50. How many piercings do you have? Just my ears, several times
51. Are you left or right handed? Right
52. What is your favorite beverage? Hot- Tea, Cold- Iced Tea,
53. Can you change a flat tire? Yes
54. When do you feel you are most attractive? When I'm sleeping
55. What event made the most impact on your life? My parent's divorce and subsequent multiple remarriages
56. Which "ex" do you miss the most? none of them
57. What celebrity would have the coolest nervous breakdown? Oprah
58. What is your favorite alcoholic beverage? Cherry Bomb martini
59. How do you top the perfect sundae? Whipped cream and a cherry
60. What TV show do you secretly watch? The L Word
61. What is your favorite outfit? Winter - Broken in Levis, brown boots, comfy sweater; Summer - sun dress
62. What is your least favorite household chore? cleaning the bathroom - yuck!
63. What is the strangest trick your body can do? My knees can hyper extend, it's bizarre
64. What was the best gift you ever got? My son
65. Which of the seven sins do you commit the most? Gossip
66. What is your favorite charity? Ronald McDonald House
67. Which language do you wish you knew? Italian
68. What would you have named yourself? Avilise Anne
69. What is your best contribution to the world? My son
70. What song are you embarrassed to admit knowing all the words to? “Dancing Queen”
71. What song gets stuck in your head most often? "I've got spurs that jingle, jangle, jingle...."
72. You can kill one person and get away with it. Who should I warn? Piggy, don't warn her.
73. What is your perfect meal? Chicken Marsala over linguine and asparagus and Lemon Meringue pie
74. What one color would you obliterate from the planet? puce
75. Do you have a favorite car? my car
76. What physical quality of yours do you like the most? My eyes
77. What is your favorite season? Autumn
78. What is your worst habit? Talking too much
79. Do you bite your tongue or tell them like it is? I can't help but tell it like it is to a fault
80. What is your favorite holiday? Halloween
81. If you could visit a different county, which would it be? Italy
82. What was your favorite childhood game? hide n' seek
83. What do people need more of? laughter
84. What do people need less of? titles
85. What's the scariest thing in your fridge? pork roll
86. What is your favorite sexual position? When I'm in control
87. Do you have a hidden talent? I "know" things - it freaks out my friends and family
88. What was the worst part of your childhood? Divorce
89. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I worry too much
90. What do you fear the most? Dying young and spiders
91. Which would you rather be a contestant on- American Idol, So You Think You Can Dance or America's Next Top Model? I have no talent, I should be paid to NOT participate
92. Which would you rather attend- the opera, a poetry recital or a random lecture? Opera
93. Would you ever bare your soul to a stranger in a letter? Why not
94. When are you at your happiest? When I'm on vacation or at Disneyland
95. What is your favorite game as an adult? Legend of Zelda
96. What celebrity would you most like to have dinner with? Dead - Jerry Garcia; Live - anyone from MCR
97. What time period do you wish you lived in? Victorian
98. Which TV personality would you want a one night hook up with? Sawyer from Lost
99. What friend do you miss the most? Laura
100. What one thing will you try not to do again? Argue with a crazy person
101. Why did you want to answer these questions? I was dared.
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